Natt (nattish) wrote,

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Malfoy and Cartman

Reading through these Southpark quotes, linked via ntamara, I've realized that Eric Cartman is quite the same as Draco Malfoy. Except, you know, not as pretty.

They're both obnoxious, bigoted, jealous, petty, and hilarious. Plus---

Cartman: Too bad drinking scotch isn't a paying job or Kenny's dad would be a millionare!

Draco: Longbottom, if brains were gold you'd be poorer than Weasley, and that's saying something.

Tee hee.

Other favorite quotes:

Cartman: You have rats in your house, too, Kenny?
Kenny: Mm-hm.
Cartman: Seriously, you better stop being so poor or else I'm gonna start huckin' rocks at you.


Goth Kid: To be a non-conformist, you have to dress in black, and listen to the same music we do.


Reporter: This week a boyscout leader has been apprehended for taking sick child pornography pictures, which we will now show you.


Dr. Hallis: Look, us plastic surgeons have one philosophy: if we can help someone's self esteem a little, then why not do it if they have three thousand dollars?


Mr. Garrison: And, so, children, that's how you tell a prostitute from a police officer. Now, are there any questions? Yes, Kyle?
Kyle: What the hell does that have to do with American history?
Mr. Garrision: Good question, Kyle. Are there any other questions?
Kyle: Mr. Garrison, I'm the only one here. Everyone else has chickenherpes.


Reporter: Do you actually believe in the ladder to heaven?
Guy: If heaven is an eight year old boy...and the ladder is my penis.

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