Natt (nattish) wrote,

On whippersnappers and sex

I was looking at lasultrix's post about minors reading NC-17 material (and the comments within it) and was highly interested. But as I got to thinking about a response, I went off subject in my head. This doesn't pertain to the same things in Lasair's post, exactly; it's just an off-shooting opinion of what she and the commenters had to say.


Smart Devils or Ignorant Angels?
Kids and sex and why people think they shouldn't mix

Have people been trained to believe that 18 is the ideal age to engage in "adult activities" because it's the age of majority in most places? Or do they sincerely believe it?

These days, when sex is mainstream entertainment, kids younger and younger are being exposed. As a result, more kids know what's smart and what's not about sex. So what's with people clinging to the idea of protecting their kids' pureness from the dirty-dirty? Kids are not "pure". They are horny little fuckers and they have sinful, nasty thoughts, just like everyone else.

I'm thinking part of it is that parents are afraid of their kids growing up. We don't want our puppy to turn into a doggy because then he's not cute anymore, just slobbery. Just the same, parents don't want their kids to think adult thoughts, or what they perceive as adult thoughts, because then they will not be little angels anymore. More bluntly---it's selfishness.

Not selfishness alone, though.

There is the general belief that sexuality is simply bad for children, in all its forms. The notion is unavoidable. It's in television programs, commercials, magazines, churches, books, posters, public schools. It's planted in the brain from an early age. It's a near unshakable ideology because the subject of children is a delicate one. And some people don't bother considering that an underage person might be capable of reading NC-17 material and coming out just fine, because it's just so scandalous. Even if they disagree, they can't tell their kids they don't mind them watching porn because they don't want to be a bad parent, do they? They don't want people to think that they're perverts, do they? So. Mouths shut, minds closed.

There is also the belief that sex is something sacred, something that should only be between two married people, and, of course, you can't do that until you're 18; if it's not within those circumstances, don't see sex, don't hear it, don't speak it.

When it comes down to it, sexuality is made out as something dangerous altogether. Perhaps the most dangerous thing in the world. Whether it's the act of sex or even the thought of sex. And to mix it with children, who are impressionable until the moment they turn 18, would be outrageous.

But, in my opinion, the most dangerous thing in the world is ignorance. I don't mean that in a PC, peace and love, you-have-to-celebrate-Kwanza-or-you're-a-racist sort of way. Just that keeping a person in a protective bubble does more damage than good.

Hiding sex from kids is censorship, and I oppose censorship in almost every form. I don't care how old the person in reference is. Honestly, when I hear BLEEP over the word "fuck" on television, when I see the blurred out middle-finger, when I hear about Janet Jackson's sinful breast, when I read list after list of books removed from student libraries for "indecency" or "racial insensitivity," I think of Communist Russia. An extreme reaction on my part, yes, but my reaction all the same.

The following is an example (from my life) about the results of censorship.


Mom: Do you know what sex is?

Natt has always been shielded from this subject and, as a result, concludes that Mother will be angry if she knows that Natt knows.

Mom: Well?

Natt: No. Never, mummy. *takes on the confused face of a future stage actor*

Mom: It's when the boy's pee pee goes into the girl's pee pee.

Natt: *mental snortsnortsnort*

Mom: Don't have sex.

Natt: Okay.

Mom: But you can always come to me if you have questions. Just don't have sex. Or watch anything containing it. Or talk about it.

Shortly thereafter:

Natt: *horny*

Instead of confiding in parents or reading an educational book or exploring personal genitalia, Natt sneaks into the living room late at night and watches porn channels.

Porn: I'm going to show you how to stick a large penis into this woman's anus.

Natt: *learns*


So, because I thought everyone disapproved of sex and didn't want me to know about it, mainly my parents, I never once confided in my mother about anything sexual. Kids don't want to get into trouble. It's the worst thing possible. If they sense disapproval, they may end up getting their education from less savory sources.

I don't mean just younger kids. Teenagers too. The ones who are reading your sexually explicit fanfic and, a lot of times, writing it. Both teens and children, and adults, really, would be better off not having to sneak around to enjoy things that come naturally. Society pushes the belief that sex is inappropriate, even while most everyone loves it and most everyone is interested in it. But it wouldn't be such a big deal if people stopped making it a big deal.

So. What I am trying to say is this: I think it's a compellation of pressures that makes a person believe underage people shouldn't be reading, watching, or having sex: mainly fear (of shocking family and friends, of losing jobs, of being confronted with legal matters), and also indoctrination and selfishness. These people should give it some more thought, in my opinion. After all, sex is as natural as breathing (and much safer on the screen than in the bed).

Lighten up! Kiddies needda wank too.
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